Welcometo PraBeacon!

I had no idea what motherhood actually meant until August 2022, when I first took her in my lap. Nobody tells you that a tiny human will break you open and put you back together in the same five minutes. 

Today, four years later, that tiny person turns four. I call her “Soan Pari”, and today, in the same day, I am shaping my aspiration – PraBeacon.

It was not planned from the beginning; the dates just landed together, on their own. I would not move either one for anything. PraBeacon does not exist without my little angle. 

Why Soan Pari?

People often ask me Your daughter has a beautiful name; why do you always tell her ‘Soan Pari’ Well, this name is close to my heart; it is from a show every Indian millennial grew up watching, about a fairy who solved whatever she touched and left something brighter behind her wherever she went. Soan comes from sona, gold—someone who makes life shine. I did not pick that name lightly. Four years in, she has earned it. Every single day. She is becoming my sunshine.

Who She Is

People appreciate her everywhere: at school, at family functions, and among strangers on the street. She’s well-behaved, disciplined, easy to be around, and I never taught her any of that on purpose. Honestly, some days I still wonder where she gets it.

Because I was not that kid. I was fussy and picky, a little bit of a rebel, but she is the opposite. Whatever’s on her plate, she eats it. No drama, no negotiating, she just flows. Every milestone landed right on time, almost like she planned it herself. I did not do anything special. She just showed up ready.

But lately, I witness a glimpse of myself in her too. She questions everything now, every rule, every habit, every single thing gets a why. Even punishment gets a why. Some days that drives me up the wall, especially when I am rushing and just need her to listen without a debate. But it also takes me back to my own childhood, when I asked why about everything and got labeled undisciplined for it.

I am breaking that chain with her. If she wants to keep asking why, she gets to keep asking why. That one is non-negotiable.

The Part I’m Not Proud Of

I am not going to hand you the soft-focus version. My schedule is relentless. Work does not pause because toys are scattered across the floor again, or her plate is still sitting on the table instead of the sink, or she has not had enough water today. On the days I have a hectic schedule and deadlines, I get angry. Over toys, over a plate, over water, of all things. Small stuff that was never worth my tone.

And then I regret it deeply.

What pulls me back is her. The way she stays close. The way her affection is still there, fully intact, minutes after I have shouted at her over nothing at all. That us what pushes me to try harder tomorrow than I managed today.

She is her dadda’s girl, and I love watching that bond. I have never once competed with it. But she never leaves me out of her heart either. Some evenings, right in the middle of something completely ordinary, she will look up and ask, “sabse pyaar kaun hai meri mumma”: who do you love the most, mumma. This takes me to the top of the seventh sky. 

Why PraBeacon

I am writing this with a four-year-old somewhere nearby and a ten-month-old who chose today, of all days, to skip her nap entirely. Some of my best ideas for this publication were born at 2 a.m., rocking a baby back to sleep, thumbs typing in the dark.

I didn’t step back from work when my second daughter arrived either. I kept going, through both girls, through diapers and deadlines colliding in the same hour, through a house that still somehow needs to run no matter how little sleep I got the night before. No nanny, no extra hands, just me, two daughters, a laptop, and whatever energy I could scrape together by the end of the day. My husband picked up the slack where he could, stepping in with the girls whenever I couldn’t. Some nights I genuinely don’t know how I pulled it off. I just did, because there was no version of that day where I didn’t.

I built PraBeacon because I could not find a place that talked about work and life the way I actually live it. The unpolished version. The plate still in the sink. The mother losing her patience over it, then regretting it an hour later. A place that puts the AI tool that saved me twenty minutes this morning right next to the toddler tantrum that undid all twenty of them.

I am not here to guide anyone, but someone building a career, running a household, raising two small humans, and trying to hold onto a little bit of sanity, writing down what I learn as I go.

Some days it works. Some days it’s chaos. Both days count. That’s PraBeacon.

To Soan Pari

You won’t read this for years yet. But it’s for you as much as anyone.

You didn’t just give me a reason to rethink what I was building. You gave me the subject matter itself. You taught me that a home-cooked meal made with care can feel as rich as any adventure I used to chase. You’ve taught me more about patience and about my own shortcomings than any book ever managed to. And every time I fall short, your love is what pulls me right back up.

Happy birthday, my Soan Pari. Thank you for making me into the person who could finally start this.

Welcome

To everyone reading this on day one, welcome to PraBeacon. Stay for the chaos and the wins, and for everything messy and real that lives in between!